tattoo.

"control yourself take only what you need from it."
it's like i can't wait for everything here to be a memory. every memory will be in that lyric.
the memories when everything was better than good. and when i see it, i'll go back to those times. i'm going to remember how everything crashed and burned after things were better than good. i'll remember the crash and i'll remember i made it out alive.


everytime i sit down here to think, i catch my breath. it is happening right now. -like i said. memories. it feels like i am having a sit down lunch with my past. especially today. mainly today. today, i couldn't even finish my dinner. one of those kinds of days. wanna know a secret? i got butterflys in my stomach today. i think they were the good kind. i know exactly why i got them i'm just not sure if i'm ready to admit it to myself, yet.

half of my brain is trying to tell me i can't psychically let go. and the other half just calls me fucking pathetic.